I’ve continued my obsession with reading, with a number of books on the go – on Audible, on my Kindle, and a number of “real” books, generally a juicy fiction one, and a “self-help”. Still reading lots of “divorce memoirs” and others on loss and healing. It’s an ongoing process!
SELF HELP/DIVORCE MEMOIRS
FEAR LESS – Dr. Pippa Grange – I learned about her in the “Dear England” play as she used her positive psychology on the England team. One part that especially resonated with me was about how people react to adversity. She speaks of “invulernability”, shutting down, avoiding, internalizing your fears, which leaves you feeling alone. The alternative is being resilient, expressing your vulnerability honestly, taking power out of your fears and anxieties. I would say the first three years of my separation I reacted in the first way. Now, further along post divorce I am solidly in the resilient phase, and it certainly feels a lot better!
IT’S CALLED A BREAKUP BECAUSE IT’S BROKEN – Greg Behrendt and Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt – This has both parts funny and practical advice. I enjoy reading these books not only to dissect the end of my marriage, but for current and future relationships, and to help others.
RUNAWAY HUSBANDS – Vikki Stark – Oh this is a good one. Even though my divorce finalized three years ago, between the pandemic and the overall fallout from the collapse of the life I thought I had, I hadn’t dealt with a lot of the trauma – and yes, it was trauma. This book speaks to me on so many levels. I have highlighted just about every page. From tips to “Let it go” to “Scenes from a Train”. “Imagine events of your life as scenery that you’re observing from the window of a train… There is always something new waiting for you on this journey.” It’s about taking a long view of your life, and knowing that this too shall pass.
I also love her “Transformational Stages”. Starts with the Tsunami (shock), Tornado (a crazy and dangerous time), Thunderstorm (wild emotions), Ice Storm (wonder if you’ll ever feel normal again), Fog (tired…), Sun Shower (good days emerge), and finally Early Spring (new opportunities, life gearing up for change), Warm Summer Day (transition into new life, view a future with anticipation, learn to create your own happiness).
I absolutely went through these stages, and they were compounded by a global pandemic and becoming an empty nester (oh, and turning 50!). I can truthfully say I’m in the Warm Summer Day (this after 8 years – 3 separated, 1 1/2 divorce proceedings, and 3 post divorce finalizing). What a blessed relief!
THE LEAVING SEASON – Kelly McMasters – a divorce memoir about the collapse of a marriage and family, beautifully written
Just for fun, as we all need these!
Any and all books by Taylor Jenkins Reid:
MAYBE IN ANOTHER LIFE (easy light read about the different paths life can take you)
FOREVER INTERRUPTED (another about love and loss)
(I’ve already read MALIBU RISING and SEVEN HUSBANDS OF EVELYN HUGO – which I adored!)
I just picked up two books at the Edinburgh Waterstones:
ABROAD IN JAPAN – a travel memoir, lots of hype, best non-fiction UK; Japan has been on my bucket list for some time. Reading a chapter a day. Makes me want to find some good sushi.
CLOSE TO HOME – this caught my eye, debut novel/memoir from Belfast writer Michael Magee, winning all kinds of accolades especially in Ireland. Just started a “book club for two” with it.
AUDIBLE BOOKS – on the go
Lighter fare while I’m walking, at the gym, going to bed, or just waking up.
FIVE STAR WEEKEND – Elin Hilderbrand – her books are always good for an escape
THE HALF MOON – Mary Beth Keane – another collapse of a marriage and dreams
THIS TIME TOMORROW – Emma Straub – time travel, and the choices we make
THE OTHER MOTHERS – Katherine Faulkner – I devoured this psychological thriller about London mummies
KINDLE
Only read one this year, as I prefer a hard copy these days. I do keep my Kindle in my bag so I always have something to read with unexpected time on my hands, or as my Dinner for One companion.
WE ARE NOT OURSELVES – Matthew Thomas – a heavy read, slice of life, the collapse of a marriage due to early Alzheimers.
LET’S KEEP READING!
That’s a wrap on the First Quarter of 2024 Books in Review! I am now inspired to turn my Second Chapter Nomad into a divorce/travel memoir. Let’s see how that goes!
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