Second Chapter Nomad
An empty nester, recently divorced, I went from a traditional family home and life, to unchartered territory in this unexpected second chapter. Threw everything into storage January 2020 (pre-pandemic) and took flight as a nomad. Come along on my journey. It’s never too late to get out of your comfort zone, take risks, and try something new.
Hello, and welcome to my Second Chapter Nomad blog! I will be writing about second chapters, the nomad life, and travel adventures. My goal is to inspire, motivate, (commiserate when necessary!) and share through my journey. Take challenges and obstacles and turn them into opportunities. Encourage anyone, at any new chapter of your life, to do something out of your comfort zone.
Please look through the menu to find all the blog posts in the above mentioned sections.
Second Chapters
Where are you at in your life? What “chapter” are you in? Is there something that you’ve been wanting to do? Take that first step. You never know where that will lead you!
I have met so many women (and men!) on these travels and in my life that in turn inspire me. I was originally a teacher, and always a writer. A mother, a nurturer, a mentor. I’m hoping this blog and my website secondchapternomad.com with Instagram as well https://www.instagram.com/secondchapternomad/ will combine all of these passions.
The intent is to lift each other up, especially during uncertain times, and periods of change. The unknown is scary! But it can also be exciting and liberating.
In January 2020 I made the bold and terrifying decision to put all of my personal belongings into storage – a 10×10 aluminum shed. This was after over twenty years in a traditional conventional family life and home, where I had been the classic Team Mom, Room Mom, Soccer Mom, Wife, while still pursuing my dreams of screenwriting and being involved in the film industry.
Empty Nest and Divorce
I had raised my kids and was on the cusp of being an empty nester, and ready to turn 50 (gasp!), when my world was turned upside down and I found myself separated after a long time marriage. Another three years went by before I found the courage to file for divorce and face the consequences of that decision – not easy for a woman who had mostly stayed home raising the children. (Stay tuned for travel posts from that tough time period – Colombia, India and Sri Lanka).
A lengthy unpleasant (aren’t they all?) divorce followed, and I couldn’t bear doing that any longer while still sharing a roof. There were many tears and dark days and darker nights, packing up, looking at photos, decorating that last Christmas tree, leaving behind all “joint” possessions, the photo albums, children’s scrapbooks that I had created, the kids’ rooms and all memorabilia, souvenirs collected from family trips, framed baby photos. Brutal.
Nomad Life
Thus began the unplanned, unexpected nomad life. I locked that storage shed, and walked out of the prison like facility with just two suitcases and flew to Scotland where I was pursuing a Scottish television series, but Edinburgh had the added bonus of a Scottish singer twenty years my junior I had previously met in Hollywood (hereafter fondly called “The Rogue”).
I visited Ireland where my son was living, London, and Berlin for the film festival and market (in my film pursuits). Little did I know that a pandemic was coming and a lockdown in March 2020. The decision of “Should I stay, or should I go?” was tortuous.
I ended up getting the last flight back to the U.S. out of Dublin. Eerie, sad, surreal.
Lockdown, a Pandemic, and Quarantine Cottage
Arrived back to my hometown in California, still in divorce proceedings, with my soon to be Ex locking down in the family home. That certainly wasn’t an option for me. So I started in my first of many AirBnBs. “Quarantine Cottage”. (Quarantine Chronicles posts under “Second Chapters”). During that time, we celebrated my daughter’s 2020 university graduation in the family home backyard.
This was followed by “Casa de Coco”, another chapter of adventures during a divorce and pandemic, where my Manchester friend, “Lockdown Loretta” also going through a divorce moved in with me.
Then August 2020, when I realized I couldn’t see my son who had also graduated in 2020 with a Masters degree in Ireland, suggested we meet in … Zanzibar!
This is when the International Nomad life began. Six weeks in Tanzania and Zanzibar. I filmed a music video while there and wrote another screenplay with my U.K. writing partner based on these escapades. (See Tanzania Tales and Zanzibar Dreams posts under “Travel Adventures”. A few of these photos by Tanzanian photographer Hopefx)
This Africa experience gave me the confidence to travel further and not sit locked down, while anxiety inducing divorce proceedings were ongoing.
The Rogue, Mexico, and a Hurricane
I talked the Rogue into leaving his day job and strict lockdown in Scotland, and joining me in Mexico for fourteen days at the Hard Rock Hotel in order to enter America as our borders were closed (weird loophole). Geez, did that fair skinned Scotsman tan! At breakfast, sipping on our all-inclusive Bloody Marys, we were told to grab our masks and a pillow and immediately evacuate on a bus bound for a hurricane shelter as the storm was barreling straight for us.
Two nights on pool deck chairs in a global pandemic with 1200 strangers, hard rock music blaring, the smell of bland buffet food permeating the air, while Hurricane Delta roared all around us. We busted out on my birthday to a Bubba Gumps which only opened for us stranded “refugees” (Mexico’s term) and took pity on my memorable birthday with singing and a cake. If ever there was a symbol of how the next four plus years would play out with the Rogue, this was it.
After the hurricane, I made the big decision to surrender to the divorce, give up the fight, the family home, and much more, and take my share of the house money. Not the best financial decision, but saved my mental health. I returned to “Casa de Coco” with the Rogue. Along with Lockdown Loretta, we lived a Three’s Company existence for a few months before she returned back to England finding her next chapter of love.
2020 saw the first bittersweet holidays as my kids returned “home”, to the home that I was no longer a part of. The divorce finalized that Christmas Eve 2020.
Mexico 2.0 plus Costa Rica
January 2021 the Rogue and I returned to Mexico, living in San Jose del Cabo for three months, figuring out next moves. (Fun posts to come from that era including bulls – actual bulls – blocking our apartment entrance a few nights.) We added on Costa Rica for a few weeks in route back to California that March. In both locations we made new lifelong friends.
Road Trip Across America
As I came to terms with the fact that I no longer had a home, but I had a car, I decided a road trip with the Rogue was in order – across America from California to Nashville and back, for another three months. Fascinating as each state, and sometimes each city had different COVID restrictions. (Road Trip posts to come.)
Back to the U.K…. via Turks and Caicos! And Antigua & Barbuda
After reconnecting with my California friends and family, it was time to go back to the U.K. after 16 months (my son was still in Ireland). At this time it was the traffic light system to enter. I didn’t want to lockdown in London, so the Rogue and I spent fourteen days in a “green” country – Turks and Caicos! What a sacrifice, haha. Then via Antigua & Barbuda back to London July 2021.
Edinburgh, Dublin and London 2021
I ended up staying in Edinburgh, home of the Rogue, until November 2021, visiting my son and friends/colleagues in Ireland and London. It was so wonderful as things had started to open back up. Attending film events, pursuing my film career again at last.
Back to California… and Dominican Republic… and Panama!
Finally back to California with the Rogue, November to January 2022. Airbnbs in Santa Monica and Santa Barbara. Another holiday season. Realizing the reality of being a renter, not a homeowner. Catching up with friends and family. Then a film opportunity presented itself in… the Dominican Republic. So the Rogue and I went for a glorious three weeks, shooting a television pilot in English and Spanish. The Rogue even got his acting debut. Stayed in Panama City on the way back to Cali for a long weekend.
Spent a few months back in Santa Barbara, in another Airbnb, enjoying a bit of a routine. Then tragically, the Rogue got the unexpected video call from his dad that his mother had died back in Scotland. After grieving for a few weeks, we returned to Scotland for the funeral. It was a somber, difficult time.
Cannes and Italy
We agreed to carry on plans to go to the Cannes film festival 2022, a welcome respite. My first time back in three years. A buzz in the air with events and meetings galore. Not having a home, I was able to stay two full weeks and enjoy every croissant and glass of rose. This was followed by ten days by train through Italy, all with the Rogue.
Trip with Daughter to Finland, Sweden, Estonia, Zakynthos
Back to the U.K. Scotland, Ireland, London. My daughter flew over to meet me and I traveled with her to Finland, Sweden, Estonia and Zakynthos, Greece. Again, when there’s no rent or mortgage to pay, the travel options are different. Wonderful moments of a lifetime with my daughter.
All posts under “Travel Adventures” including Zakynthos below.
Kingston Upon Thames and Cat Sitting
August 2022, Rogue and I secured a house in Kingston Upon Thames for a month, arranged serendipitously by meeting a woman in the security line at the Dublin airport. Took care of her cat Monty. I miss having a pet, cost of being a nomad. Plotting and planning my next moves. Figuring out ways to keep this lifestyle financially sustainable. When my September AirBnb turned out to be fraud, the Kingston next door neighbor offered up her house to take care of her cat Archie. Now I was the Cat Lady of Kingston!
One of my biggest worries as an empty nester and nomad, was not getting to see my grown children enough. Turns out my exotic lifestyle is attractive! They both came to see me two times this past summer in London.
London Baby (2022)
London was more difficult than expected to secure lodging, so ended up two weeks living in the private Groucho Club in Soho. What an experience that was! Met interesting people that might lead to new film projects. Followed by a stint at an upscale Heathrow airport hotel, then at Chelsea Harbor where the Chelsea football team stays and marches through the lobby on game days. I discovered a fabulous film project that only came to me by being out and about and saying “yes” at every opportunity.
Home Town Holidays
Went back to California for my third season as a nomad for the holidays. Yes, the Rogue came with me yet again. Who ever expected this? Reconnected with friends and family, staying in Airbnbs back and forth from Santa Barbara, Santa Monica and San Diego.
Jamaica & Bahamas
2023 winter included Jamaica and the Bahamas, spending three weeks in the Caribbean with the Rogue, before going back to London. This life is a wild ride.
After another stint in London, Cannes Film Festival 2023, back to California, then it was summer in New York, a dream for a writer.
Another Autumn in London, cat sitting with the Rogue, before the holidays in California, including two trips to Mexico and another trip to Texas to see my kids for Thanksgiving. Christmas back in my hometown (fourth out of the house and with the Rogue – crazy!).
Another five months in 2024 followed in the UK (mostly London with visits to my old haunts – Edinburgh, Manchester (Loretta!), then Dublin, and Belfast.) Another Cannes film festival (with the Rogue), side trip to Italy and Switzerland with my Daughter, and then back to my California hometown once again, and another reset/reshuffle in storage unit.
It has been four and a half years since I put my belongings in storage, living out of suitcases ever since. I am untethered and free. I can’t imagine ever being “locked down” again.
I invite you along on my journey. I’ll write individual posts on the travel adventures briefly explained above, along with posts about Second Chapters, and tips for the nomad. My Instagram will continue to be in real time, going into the great unknown. There are lots of tips and info on each travel destination in the travel category. More to come!
I’d love to hear from you. What is something you want to do or is something holding you back? What is your next step?
Signing off, for now.
Blessings!
Kim, Second Chapter Nomad
I have rediscovered my love of reading (lost in the pandemic and divorce). As a writer, reading is a must. My motto is Live to Write, Write to Live. I have started quarterly book reviews. Take a look!
Continuing on this journey, I try to take time to reflect and to see how far I’ve come. I don’t deny the pain and challenges that came along the way.